New U2

[Cheryl]

On Sat, I went and picked up a new U2. She is 10 or 11 years old and very friendly and snuggly with her former owners. I was told she did not have the time to give to Sydney, the U2 as she was raising Danes. While I was there I pet and talked with her and she was friendly. The ride home was horrible, bumpy roads, 3 hour trip, etc. The people took her to the vet before I picked her up to get well birdy check up, nail trims and wing trims. Her nails look like dog nails, way too short, and her wings were trimed close to the body and not the flight feathers. Never had a bath and ate only pasta and bird seed. She is trying new veges and cooked foods here. How do I get to have a relationship with her. Get her used to baths and even hold her? She just shakes when I come around. The problem is I do not know what to do. She hates me and loves my daughter. Does she blame me for the changes? What do I do? I am so upset. My largest rehome was an LSC and he fell in love with my husband and vice a versa so I am a little nervous of being bitten.

[birdie]

On Sat, I went and picked up a new U2. She is 10 or 11 years old and very friendly and snuggly with her former owners. I was told she did not have the time to give to Sydney, the U2 as she was raising Danes. While I was there I pet and talked with her and she was friendly. The ride home was horrible, bumpy roads, 3 hour trip, etc. The people took her to the vet before I picked her up to get well birdy check up, nail trims and wing trims. Her nails look like dog nails, way too short, and her wings were trimed close to the body and not the flight feathers. Never had a bath and ate only pasta and bird seed. She is trying new veges and cooked foods here. How do I get to have a relationship with her. Get her used to baths and even hold her? She just shakes when I come around. The problem is I do not know what to do. She hates me and loves my daughter. Does she blame me for the changes? What do I do? I am so upset. My largest rehome was an LSC and he fell in love with my husband and vice a versa so I am a little nervous of being bitten.


You have just turned her world upside down. It will take some time for her to settle in to your home. Sit by her cage and talk to her; read a kids book, offer her treats, and just let her get use to her new home. It will take some time. You'll need to go at her pace don't force her too fast. You saw the sweetie she can be now she's gonna make you work for it.
Make you a dish of food and sit near her cage so she can see you eat & eat what she's eating. {fresh veggies I mean} Get a large shallow pan and put some water in and just let her investigate and see if she will bath herself.
Remember all of this stuff is new to her and she's frightened.
I'm sure there will be more suggestions on the way!

I would also recommend the book ; The Parrot Problem Solver

http://goodbirdinc.com/books.html

[too&me]

Good advice-go slow, be non threatening in your movements and take time to let her adjust to her new location, her new people and build some trust. Ask her last home what her favorite treats are and let her know you are the treat lady.

[Julie]

A little reading out loud sitting next to the cage in a calm relaxed tone works well also. Be generous with the treats, she just needs some time.

[Cheryl]

I did ask her former owner what she likes and was told alfredo fett and so that is what she was fed. I was also told that she never received any veges and fruits because she did not like them so she was never offered any. Also, about the cage, it is way too small. I am getting her a new bigger cage next week. I already put new toys in the cage she has now which are being ignored. She came with 2 one we threw out and the other is being washed and recycled. She had only one perch which was cement. She won't sit on the other perched that I put in there, should I take the cement perch out? she is had to get back into her cage when I let her out what do I do there? I am sorry there are so many questions.

[too&me]

Don't make changes yet other than offering her more healthy choices in her diet. I would not change her perch yet it holds some security for her. Alfredo fettuccine is way too high in fats for a Too but I would wean her off gradually for now and keep any changes minimal as she has a new cage coming & that will be one more big change in her life. I would intro it gradually also. Place it near hers so she can see it and climb on at as she gets bolder. After she gets more at ease with it move her favorite perch over and let her see you put toys and her favorite foods inside. It can be hard for them to let go of the old as it is the only thing that stayed the same in her upside down world and it is her territory. When we got Harry a new cage he had only been with us a short while but as soon as he saw the cage being carried up the drive way he knew it was for him showing a great deal of excitement, crest up dancing display, he had a quick transition. You can reward her for getting back inside the cage with praise and a treat.

[Chrissy and Flock]

When Cassie first came to me she would not go back into her cage for me, so I would get a large thick towel and gently wrap her in it... I would hold her for a minute or two talking softly to her... then I would put her in the cage... however since she has a much bigger cage now she goes back in without any problem... I personally would not remove the cement perch yet... she is going through so many changes already.. just be patient Cheryl she will come around for you... be sure to stop and say hi to her everytime you pass her cage...

[Cheryl]

Thank you all for the great advice. I really do appreciate it. I really do want her to like me. I won't do any more changing, I will just let things stay as they are. But what about shower/baths? She is afraid of the mister. The previous owner never gave her a bath. Just put the bowl of water in her cage or on top or?

[birdie]

Thank you all for the great advice. I really do appreciate it. I really do want her to like me. I won't do any more changing, I will just let things stay as they are. But what about shower/baths? She is afraid of the mister. The previous owner never gave her a bath. Just put the bowl of water in her cage or on top or?

I would put it on the floor near her cage but not close enough to scare her and see if she will go to it. Maybe sit with your hand in it and show her it's nice. This may take awhile for her to check it out. Offer the bowl in the same spot everyday for say 30-45 minutes so she can see it won't hurt her.
Also, when she lets you get so she is comfortable with you petting her you could try a very wet wash cloth and gently pet her with it. This is how I taught my U2. {I used a white cloth}

Hope this helps!

[Patty, Linus and Co.]

I think it's important to understand that developing a relationship takes a long time sometimes. It's going to be based on trust that has to be earned. Give her as much time as she needs. Let her come around at her own speed. By not forcing yourself on her she will learn that you are trustworthy and safe. It took my rehomed U2 about four months before I was sure he felt secure with me. We have a wonderful relationship now. Good luck!

[FoxersArtist]

I think there is one thing that needs to change right away but it doesn't have to do with your new U2's routine, diet, bathing etc. All of that can come with time and trust. I think the most valuable thing you can do for her right now is to take a deep breath and realize that you are a FANTASTIC bird owner and a very loving person. Feeling nervous or on edge around her will only put her on edge (giving her the impression that YOU don't like her!) Birds pay so much attention to every detail and I think that in so many ways, they are masters of knowing how we feel. I think if you throw away the anxiety of "will she like me?!?" and just get to know her personality and accept her for whatever she is going to be, (even if that is a scared, shivering mess) she will start to respond to you. Afterall, you are an avid bird lover and you do have cockatoo experience!!!

Whenever I get a new bird I always assume that this bird is my best buddy even if the very first thing I witness is aggressive or fearful body language toward me. Could this bird bite me? Sure, but when we own parrots, sometimes we get bit. When you do step her up, try offering your forearm where she can do less damage than to your fingers, or your hand wrapped in a towel if she will allow - that may give you a bit more confidence. (BTW I'm not saying that you shouldn't be cautious. Do try to read body language as big birds can do some damage.) What I am saying is that you wouldn't believe how soothing it is to a new bird to see a great level of confidence in who they are and who you are because it sends the message that we are all OK here, dispite all of this change. Try to be as joyful and upbeat as she will tolerate.

Aside from these things, I try to fit any new bird into the routine as if they had always been there. If the other birds get a bath, so do the new ones (unless they totally freak out...that's not healthy). If the other birds get a banana, so do the new ones. Even if a new bird doesn't seem to love something like a bath, they seem to accept this new change rather quickly once they figure out that this is just the way things are done around here and most of them really let loose once they see how much fun we are all having! Treat Sydney like one of the flock since that's what she is and treat yourself like the expert that you are! She'll come around!
-Anna



Thank you all for the great advice. I really do appreciate it. I really do want her to like me. I won't do any more changing, I will just let things stay as they are. But what about shower/baths? She is afraid of the mister. The previous owner never gave her a bath. Just put the bowl of water in her cage or on top or?

[jelandusn]

Hi,
First off I'd like to say congrats with your new bird. I just recently got an African Grey a few months ago and had the same worries. My grey is from Korea and has only been around Korean people. His last owner was a man and the owners at the pet store were also men. I was so worried that me being so different, (I'm a black woman) and speaking a different language would be too much and he wouldn't bond with me. When we first got home, he was very nervous around me but wasn't very nervous around my husband , who just happens to be korean, so I was worried he would bond to him and not me. The only reason I was worried about that was because my husband wants nothing to do with him. Thankfully I was wrong! Here is what I did. He's my first parrot so I'm not an expert. I just went at his speed. I never forced him to do anything. He would sit on my finger with not much problem. He was a little nervous the first day I held him on my hand so I just went and sat with him on the couch. After he was comfortable sitting on my hand I took him to different rooms and just talked with him and gave him treats. During this time, I didn't try to pet him at all. I don't like strangers touching me so I just assumed he wouldn't either. Just being on my hand and going to different, fun places made him start trusting me. I knew we would be ok when he started to call for me when I went to another room. Even then I didn't pet him. I had him for about 2 months before I pet him because I waited until he invited me to. I would touch his beak but that's it. Now we have a great bond. I can touch him anywhere and he loves to lay on his back in my hand. He also was scared of water so what I did was take him into the bathroom and tried the shower. This was after he was comfortable with me. He wouldn't let me put him under the shower but he would let the water splash from my hand onto him. I was hoping he'd let me use the shower eventually, but I didn't want to force the issue so I got a mister. He really likes that and he also loves to take bathes in a water dish. I think if you just go slow and don't do things that make your bird too nervous until he trusts you, things will go great. Even if it's not the best situation, I think you shouldn't wait change things. My bird didn't have toys or new perches in his cage for a month after he got home. He also just ate sunflower seeds too for just that long. Things do need to change but not right away. Sorry for the long post but I hope it works. Just be prepared for the possibility that the bird may not bond to you. If you're daughter won't be around for a long time and doesn't want to take the bird with her when she moves then maybe you could limit the things she does with the bird. If you are the one who's mostly around the bird then by default it will hopefully bond to you. I hope this made sense and good luck!

[too&me]

Great advice Jelandusn! Going slow and letting the bird take the lead is the best way to build trust.

[Cheryl]

Thanks for advice. Things are going a lot better. I can pet her now and have been misting her, and today caught her in her water dish trying to bathe. So I now know she likes baths. We will try that. I will take pics and try to post. Thanks again.